Sunday, May 22, 2011

Tonight I went for a late night walk....the breeze coming in my window was beautiful and cool and it beckoned me to put the old gym shoes on and step. At 9:30pm mind you.

I used to go for walks all the time in Brooklyn. Well obviously living in New York you walked everywhere, but late night cool weather walks in Brooklyn were one of my favorite things about living in New York. I spent most of my 9+ years there living in Park Slope, Brooklyn (with a year stop in Hoboken New Jersey). The people, smells the overall vibe of Brooklyn and oh how I loved Prospect Park-ah my pond. I can't even believe I'm writing about Brooklyn in past tense like its some far away distant thing that happened part of me still feels like I live there. I've only been in Denver for about 7 months now so it sort of still feels like 'One foot in New York, one foot in Colorado' I'd say.

There was NO ONE out there on the walk. I mean like no one. And the quiet, although meditative, was more disconcerting to me then my late night walks home from the subway in Brooklyn. At least there was always people around there. Tonight I got that 'Halloween-murderer-around-the-bush' creeps as I strolled through the subdivision here in Lowry. And at one point, some type of mammouth bug jumped out and bit/hit my leg. I was like a city boy parody then jumping with an EEK. I'm still warming up to Mountains, hell they scare me more than Times Square at 3am. Even still, my evening walk tonight was amazing with my favorite type of evening weather, beautiful homes, peace, street lamps, breeze-oh so good for the soul.

I noticed that in 2009 I had written in my blog how New York was now permanently my home, and how I loved/hated it-and look at me now all up in Colorado's grill. Hmmf Life is unexpected isn't it? I have been very blessed since I got here to Denver. A wonderful place to live, new amazing friends that have basically fallen in my lap in the most miraculous ways, new work as an artist once again. SO excited to start my Theatre Aspen job in a couple of weeks. It fills me with a deep sense of gratitude. But my nature always seems to be one of 'seeking'. And although most signs lean toward me staying here the verdict is still out if I will permanently make Colorado my home. I love Denver I now viscerally understand why the late great John Denver sang so passionately about it here lol. But also part of my soul is still in New York. And even a bit in my hometown Chicago. Maybe it's the Libra in me. Something astrological, this seeking. Part of my journey I guess. But when I look back on all I've done thus far in my years, particularly my brave jumps to live in different states and cities I feel really proud of myself.

As I finished my walk I looked up at the night twinkling starry sky and said an audible 'thank you'. I know it sounds corny but I believe you need to send out that energy to God and the Universe when you feel it so strongly. Whispered prayers of gratitude. Always the seeker I try to stay present and not seek too much but stay and enjoy. 'Wherever you go, there you are'. Except tonight I couldn't least in the house. Excited to see what next is in store for me......

1 comment:

Niki Naeve said...

From one seeker to another...I'm in San Fran thinking, oh, why don' I move here?

I seriously need to drag you out on some beautiful hikes out there, my friend!

I don't necessarily think you have to chose either this place or that...though having roots in more than one place can get complicated, as C and I will attest to. But it's not like you're "cheating" on NYC to be in Denver, or vice-versa, for heaven's sake! There are mostly practical, logistical, and financial concerns with bi-locating... staying in touch with friends is easier than ever. THANKFULLY!