Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Friday, I got the full works at John Allan company, a sort of chi chi spa for men with chains all over Manhattan.

My friend Ginger at work gave me a free gift card for this special treat, which I gratefully snatched up and received what John Allan calls the 'full service'; shoe shine, shampoo and conditioning treatment, scalp massage, haircut, manicure, beverage and a facial. The facials not included, I threw that in for a special treat. I'm beginning to realize treats that de-stress like these i.e. massages, etc are quickly becoming more of a necessity versus a luxury to survive New York stress.

The facial is what I'm going to get to delight in details to you. But for the moment…

I felt like a well treated English gentlemen upon my arrival served a beverage, a black coat and shoe shine upon my rather beat up payless shoe store brown shoes. They look brand spanking new I might say. My coworker had been there before and prewarned me to make sure I have tip money for all. Where's my dollar bills?? So tip I did. I skipped the manicure because I got my first manicure this past week with Erin, and the picking at hand flesh with blunt metal utensils was not something I was anxious to repeat. Um, yah why didn't anyone tell me manicures were painful?

But oh lawd I love the facials. If you know me well, you know I have always loved facials and so does my rather sensitive and unruly skin. I rarely get them, but when I do my skin loves 'em and I look like a neutrogena ad after. Last one I paid $15 for (coupons people) in Wisconsin and it was jamazing. I particularly enjoy the extraction part. After awhile the throbbing sting as the esthetician picks at your blackheads, pimples and clogged pores becomes masochistically enjoyable. More! More! More! *sigh.

I was not prepared for Theresa's facial expertise extraordinaire. I don't think I have ever had such a detailed extraction process. When she started digging at my nasal fold corners, and plucking beard hairs, well this was when I began to reconsider childbirth or open heart surgery without anesthetic as a more viable pain option. For those of you who have never had a facial it begins with cleansing, scrubbing, lots of steam from a scary tube, scrub scrub, the extractions, mask, lotions, potions and the best part…a strange outerspace zapping blue current wand that kills bacteria beneath the skins surface. It feels a little like getting licked by a cat. An electric cat. *Zap. Hey man, you are one electric cat, dawg. Cat? Dawg?

A sploosh more of this and that and voila…you're done. A new person.

For those of you pondering what to get me for my next birthday or xmas gift, I'll make this easy…….facials. Who else do you know who goes so ga ga for the za za wand and pick pick I ask? Or better yet, get yourself one. You'll never look back. A new day has come.

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